Eminem, on his album Recovery, had his demons doing jumping jacks. I've concluded that everyone has their own demons to exercise. You don't know what makes the cashier at your local grocery store tick. You don't know what eats at him or what keeps him up at night. You don't know what he needs to do to make himself happy or even satisfied. All you know is that he's taking too long to ring up your purchase.
I really value the time on Sundays that I get to spend alone with my thoughts and feelings. I usually start the day by going to church for 8 am, and other than socializing with a great group of people old enough to be my parents, I find the time to reflect on the week, gather my thoughts, and remember what's important. I end the day with an hour drive home on relatively bare roads, again, thinking, feeling and putting it all in perspective. The two bookends of my Sundays get me and my demons the exercise that we need.
I find that I wrestle with my thoughts and feelings a lot more than you might think. I have my good days and my bad days...and I think the good outnumber the bad. The bad days sting though...I'm angry, vindictive, and selfish. They're not days that make me feel good.
Cliche as it may sound, I do believe that how you feel is contagious. Feeling good today makes me more likely to feel good tomorrow. Feeling crappy today makes me more likely to feel crappy tomorrow. The people in my life almost always inspire me to be better...their unbridled optimism, enthusiasm and care for the things they do often serve as a kick in the butt for me...and it helps me remember that I also can control how I behave. My dad used to tell me regularly, "you can't control how you feel, but you can control how you behave." Turns out, by controlling how you behave, you can control a bit of how you feel.
Controlling how you behave still feels like a charade at times. I don't always feel like saying or doing the right thing...and plenty of times I don't. For me, the single best way to keep myself on task and feeling good is to check in with my emotions regularly. I need to take a moment out of my busy life to get those demons some exercise...to look them in the eye and deal with them. For me, spending some time with my thoughts kneeling in a pew helps....so does driving alone late at night. Everyone deals with their demons differently...but you need to deal with them. You can't survive otherwise.
